...of a Silent Speaker

In my life, I speak the loudest when I am silent.

That might sound a little odd, but give me some time to explain. You see, I love words. Ever since I learned to read I have been fascinated with how words work. Two different combinations of the same set  of words can mean completely different things! Words can draw pictures in the mind and evoke emotions you didn't know were there. Words can make or break a relationship. Words are powerful. Words are  heard.

My love of words has been transferred over to a love of many things; reading, talking, and most of all, writing. Most people are more likely to hold back their emotions when they write than when they are talking. With writing, there is the ability to erase, to backtrack. When you're talking, there is no backspace key. Once something is out, there's no way to take it back, no matter how much you may want to. For this reason, most people are more transparent when they talk.

I am not most people.

For me, writing is a way to get all of my emotions out. I find that I'm more honest with myself when I'm writing. When I journal, I use a pen. I don't let myself erase because whatever I write comes from somewhere. Don't get me wrong, I don't hide things when I talk. But I don't let everything out either.
If you want to know how I really feel, you can ask me. I'll tell you my opinion; I'm a vocal person. But if you give me a pen and piece of paper something more will come to the surface, something deeper that sometimes I don't even know is there.

This is why I have more journals than there are months in the year. I have three going at once, plus this blog. I write my prayers. I write my dreams. I write my experiences. Writing clears my head. Writing organizes my thoughts. My writing shows the real me.

In my life, I speak the loudest when I am silent. I speak the loudest when I am writing.